What?

If anyone had told me 5
No.
even 1 year ago that I would be on prom court, wearing a big poofy dress and really excited about both of them, I would've freaked out.
Then I probably would have continued playing soccer in mud and punching boys.

I still play soccer in the mud and punch boys.
I haven't changed, but I totally have.

If I have to run against people for prom and ruin someone's night, its not worth it.
I could go my whole life not being prom queen and dealing with it just fine.
Sadly, there are other people who couldn't.
I hate that.


Senior year is so weird.
I'm so happy its almost over.

Okay, no.

I just posted another one liner.


I wish things were clearer because nothing ever is.
I love figuring things out, I just wish that I wouldn't have to do it sometimes.

Everything that I've always been looking forward to in my high school career is now here.
I told Kim, "I don't know what I'll do after prom and graduation when I'm sitting in my new apartment in G-Raps."

Which is kind of true.
I won't have anything to look forward to.
I mean, I will.
Just not this many things.

But I definitely know that I'll be keeping myself busy over there.
If I don't, I won't have the money to stay there.



I'm ready to push my limits.
Which is good, since thats exactly what I'm going to be doing.

I wish

things were clearer.

I don't know

What I'm thinking anymore.

I'm losing it.

Its hard to tell what has been taken away and what I've pushed myself away from.


But it seems like nothing's here for me anymore.

Man.

Whatever happened to acceptance?

I lived in the moment

tonight.


For the first time in a looong time.

It was so good.

Every day I:

get farther out of Clio
Get closer to G-raps
Lose my sanity a little more
Drift away from the kids here a little more
Drift away from my church more
Appreciate The Harvest coffee house even more.
That, Max, and Emily are gonna be the only things I miss.





I'm beyond obsessed.